“What we learn about history depends on who was able to write down firsthand accounts and preserve them,” says �鶹ӳ����ý Associate Professor of History Rosalind Beiler. “As we discover more information, it can change our perspective.”

Beiler teaches the history of New England, including the landing of the Mayflower, which happened on Nov. 11, 1620. Some students said they’d only learned one thing about the events in grade school: The Pilgrims sailed to the New World, made friends and enjoyed the first Thanksgiving feast.

“We’ve learned,” says Beiler, “that it wasn’t so easy.”

Here is what her research tells us:

1. The story we’re most familiar with comes from one dominant source.

William Bradford was among the Puritans who wanted to break from England’s rule over the way Christians could worship and raise their children. Bradford kept a journal documenting before, during and after the Mayflower’s Atlantic crossing.

“We have bits of information from other diaries,” says Beiler, “but for the most part, a lot of what we know has been filtered through Bradford’s accounts.”

We know what we know because he wrote it down.

2. The Pilgrims tried living in the Netherlands before coming to America.

The Puritans and the Pilgrims (a cross-section of Puritans) first traveled to the Netherlands to establish a Christian church that would be free of government influence. There, they had to learn a new language and new customs. Many of them labored as textile workers when they had been farmers at home. They also became concerned that their children were not growing up English — they were being integrated into Dutch society.

“One of my students said this part of the story helped her understand what it’s like to be an immigrant,” says Beiler. “T���y left behind everything they knew and had to find their way in a new place.”

After 12 years, in 1620, they decided to sail to the New World, where they could worship freely and develop an English culture.

3. The Mayflower originally was set to sail with a sister ship.

The Pilgrims initially sailed from the Netherlands back to England on a ship called the Speedwell. In England, they met up with other passengers before leaving for the long trip to North America on the Speedwell and the Mayflower. The Speedwell didn’t get far before it started to take on water and all passengers had to then board the Mayflower, though some on the original passenger list stayed home.

“T��� Mayflower was crowded,” Beiler says of the 102 passengers and 30 crewmembers on the 100-foot ship. “But they found out later they actually could have used more ���DZ����.”

4. Delays forced them to sail as winter approached.

It took nearly three months to secure supplies and manually load supplies. Instead of crossing the ocean in June, they wound up battling the storms and cold of late fall.

“We can’t imagine what it was like for them to arrive in a brutally cold and strange place, to be sick and to have loved ones dying,” says Beiler. “And remember, they had no time to rest. They had to immediately start building a community so they could survive.”

5. Many famous Americans can be traced to Mayflower

John Howland, an indentured servant on the Mayflower, almost flipped overboard during a storm, but miraculously grabbed a rope on his way into the sea. Howland lived, got married and had a number of children who continued a lineage to the likes of Ralph Waldo Emerson and George Bush (both of them). In fact, at least nine U.S. presidents could follow their genealogy to Mayflower passengers.

“T���re’s no telling how many people can trace their ancestry back to the few dozen passengers who survived illness and danger on the Mayflower voyage,” Beiler says.

6. Nearly half of the Pilgrims and Puritans died during the voyage.

Only 50 of the original 102 passengers survived the first winter. “T���y weren’t thinking about colonizing,” says Beiler. “T���y were simply figuring out how to eat and stay warm in this new place.”

7. An epidemic had just decimated Native Americans.

The English settlers found what they probably considered a blessing from God: an area of cleared land suitable for a village. Actually, it had already been a village known as Pautuxet. From 1616-19, an epidemic killed about 2,000 Wampanoag people who lived there. But when the Pilgrims arrived in November 1620, Tisquantum (Squanto) was the only one lone survivor in the village.

“He brought Massasoit, a Wampanoag Sachem from another village, to make an alliance with the Pilgrims,” says Beiler. “T���y all needed each other as allies during a time of tremendous loss for both groups.”

8. Yes, corn probably did save lives.

It’s true that Tisquantum taught the immigrants from Europe a new form of agriculture: controlled burns to clear portions of land so they could grow beans, squash and maize (corn).

“T��� Pilgrims and Puritans had no choice but to do what the Wampanoag Indians taught them,” says Beiler. “We’re also pretty sure they stole some seed from a Native American village during that first year and later went back to make reparations.”

9. The first Thanksgiving was held a year after the Mayflower

How could the Mayflower passengers lose more than half of their community, even entire families, and a year later set aside a day for a “harvest celebration?”

They didn’t, at least not exactly.

“T��� first Thanksgiving in 1621 was an expression of gratitude, but not just for an abundance of food,” says Beiler. “T���y were grateful to be alive while also mourning the loss of so many loved ones.”

10. The lessons of Thanksgiving were quickly forgotten.

Once the Pilgrims began to settle, they sent word back to England for others to come join them. The later arrivals, however, didn’t value the local wisdom of the Wampanoag.

“As more people arrived, tensions between the English and Native Americans grew,” says Beiler.

The new settlers brought domesticated animals to help with farming. They fenced in their crops and allowed the animals to roam outside those fences. The animals decimated the Native Americans’ fields. This would be among the early signs of English groups forcing their cultural will on Native Americans.

11. North America was really a New-ish

By the time the Mayflower arrived, French and Dutch colonies were already fishing and gathering along the East Coast. The Spanish had settled in Florida decades earlier. So, if the Mayflower’s passengers weren’t the first Europeans to arrive, why are they so prominent in our history books?

“We call where they landed ‘New England,’ in part, because guess who won the subsequent wars?” says Beiler. “T��� English also did something very important, thanks to William Bradford.”

They told their story.

“T���re are a lot of studies that show that our thoughts lead first, then our emotions follow,” says W. Steven Saunders, �鶹ӳ����ý associate lecturer of psychology and a licensed psychologist. “Given that, establishing positive emotions or wellbeing — even in the face of difficult things happening in your life — by practicing gratitude can psychologically shifts your attention to things that are actually going right in your life.”

Understanding the Benefits

Thanksgiving is a time when people typically express their appreciation for their family, friends, or a delicious meal, but the changes and challenges of this year may make it hard to find this spirit.

“Whether you’re talking to older relatives or younger friends over the holidays, talk with them about if they’ve seen anything good come out of this strange, bizarre year and it might be interesting to see what different generations have to say about that,” says Linda Simmons ’20�Ѵ�, aa staff therapist who supports students through the ’s Counseling and Wellness Services.

“T��� most reliable research suggests there is an indirect impact on physical health.” — Linda Simmons ’20�Ѵ�, College of Medicine staff therapist

Regardless, gratitude can be a daily practice that has long-term effects. Over the past decade, many studies on gratitude have shown varying advantages, such as improving sleep and mental health, reducing ailments, and even boosting your immune system.

But the benefits may not happen the way you think.

“T��� most reliable research suggests there is an indirect impact on physical health,” says Simmons, who recently earned a master’s in counselor education from �鶹ӳ����ý. “Gratitude can help you receive the benefits of greater emotional well-being, psychological health, and social health, which can cause people to be more likely to take care of themselves physically and their medical health needs.”

And while there have been mixed results on gratitude’s ability to influence levels of depression, Saunders notes that positive and negative emotions have a hard time coexisting together.

“When you purposely set up a positive emotion, it cascades and helps you feel good more often,” Saunders says.

Authenticity is Key

Some people are naturally predisposed to a more negative outlook, making it harder to find things to be thankful for than others, Simmons says. Even if you’re a glass-half-full type of person, it may be challenging some days to maintain your gratitude.

“One thing we don’t find very helpful is forced gratitude.” — Linda Simmons ’20�Ѵ�, College of Medicine staff therapist

“One thing we don’t find very helpful is forced gratitude,” Simmons says. “I wouldn’t advise launching into a person for whom gratitude doesn’t come easy or telling someone to ‘Just look on the bright side.’ Oftentimes that actually makes a person feel less positive.”

Instead, take time to truly process whatever you’re feeling, especially if you’ve lost experiences, people or opportunities in the past year. Sometimes the best thing you can do for someone else is to just listen.

“A lot of negativity is fear-based and we’re living in an age where there’s a lot of fear going around,” Saunders says. “What we know about psychology is the more you talk about your feelings and emotions the more they change. So approaching someone with compassion and really listening can really make a difference.”

Once, you’re ready to start focusing on the positive, Saunders says you should develop a ritual or routine around the value that is meaningful to you.

Grow Your Gratitude

Gratitude is a like a muscle and like any muscle consistent exercise is necessary for growth. One common practice is the “T��� Big Three,” naming or writing a list of three things you’re grateful for each day. Keeping a gratitude journal can benefit you personally, as well as professionally. A study conducted by �鶹ӳ����ý researchers earlier this year found the habit can lead employees to exhibit less rude behavior and mistreatment of others in the workplace.

Another method is writing a letter to someone who has made a difference in your life. Although gratitude can make a difference even when you keep it to yourself, sharing your appreciating with others can help spread positive feelings and strengthen your relationships.

When giving thanks to a loved one, a new study published in Sage Journals found it’s best to be specific about how they helped support your needs. It also found that you should avoid pointing out sacrifices an individual has made for you since it diminishes their altruistic motivation for doing so.

“Even if you don’t have a spiritual or religious belief, you can still practice gratitude in some simple ways every day.” — W. Steven Saunders, psychology associate lecturer

“Whatever your personal belief system might be, you can incorporate that,” Saunders says. “Even if you don’t have a spiritual or religious belief, you can still practice gratitude in some simple ways every day.”

Simmons, who has experience as a Presbyterian minister and a hospital chaplain, says gratitude is an important value and practice in most major world religions, including Christianity, Judaism, Islam, Buddhism and Hinduism.

“For some people, gratitude is spiritual. For other people, it’s interpersonal. But it’s outside ourselves in some way, something we didn’t make happen, cause, create, or earn — it’s given to us as a gift,” Simmons says. “To me, gratitude is an invitation to say ‘I wonder if that’s the only way we can look at this day, week, month, season or year? Is there a way we can look at not just what we lost or missed, but what we learned, what is new about a circumstance or what brought us closer?’ Most of us have never been through a pandemic before, and we don’t know how to handle it, so however we’ve handled it is OK.”

Students struggling with maintaining their emotional and mental well-being can find support through . �鶹ӳ����ý employees and their dependents can take advantage of the , which provides confidential, short-term counseling at no cost.

He says something along the lines of: “I’m pretty sure the Pilgrims at Plymouth did not have pernil on their table during their Thanksgiving celebration.” (For the uninitiated, pernil is a traditional pork roast dish in many Caribbean countries.)

This �鶹ӳ����ý Forum was written long before COVID-19. The author says her family will observe the holidays more privately this year and will heed all CDC guidelines. “T���re are a lot of treasured folks in our midst – and we are not taking chances.”

What? Pernil, rice and beans, rice and peas, yellow plantain casserole, Bustelo in abundant quantities, Dominican cake, tres leches and flan are not staples of everyone’s Thanksgiving dinner? Who knew? I certainly didn’t.

But I do know that just as the settlers who started this tradition, we Americans of Hispanic descent are as invested as everyone else in the celebration of Thanksgiving.

There are so many things to be grateful for: freedom of expression, friendships, free enterprise, educational opportunities and societal mobility, among countless more. In short, all the characteristics that make our country great.

Thanksgiving is a time when we, as a nation, put our problems on hold and reflect on our many blessings and good fortune.

How exactly do we do this? Well, apparently not in a one-size-fits-all fashion.

I was born in New York and have always lived in the United States except for four years I lived in the Dominican Republic as a child. And for as long as I can remember, my extended family’s Thanksgiving celebrations have been hosted by whoever happened to have the biggest house capable of accommodating our huge family: my maternal grandparents, my 12 aunts and uncles and their spouses, my 30-plus cousins, (and their significant others), and children, in addition to extended family in the area and out-of-town guests. It’s a dressy occasion, and while attendance is not “mandatory,” it’s understood by all that it is mandatory.

Over the past decade, however, given that our family is now split between New York City and Florida, attendance has declined a bit.  We now average between 60 and 70 people because not everyone can make it here. (But we keep in constant touch in other ways. Gracias, Facebook!)

Dinner is usually held around 8 p.m.�� The gathering is filled with laughter, storytelling, the constant inventory of who and what dish has arrived and which ones are missing – and, of course, good music.

As you can imagine, the food is divided among different families. After all, home cooking for this small army is no small task. Luckily, my mom and aunts take charge of dividing the cooking responsibilities and they each have their specialty. My mom is the pastelon-queen (yellow plantain casserole); Tia Irene is the chicken-and-turkey-stew goddess; Tia Luisa and Tia Tago are Martha Stewart’s Dominican counterparts; Tia Caridad is a rice connoisseur; Tia Mary is a dessert expert, etc.

As for me and my generational counterparts, we are usually assigned the plasticware, beverages, green salad, etc. (You know, the really hard stuff). From time to time, however, we are also assigned some kind of “traditional” dish (such as the pernil), which using the language of today’s global economy, we often enthusiastically outsource to a bodega.

In light of my husband’s dismay at the inaccuracy (unauthenticity?) of our Thanksgiving dinner selections, and in the interest of exposing our daughters to mainstream culture, last year during Thanksgiving week I decided to enlist our daughters’ help in researching what the Pilgrims enjoyed at their Thanksgiving feast. I challenged our girls to research ingredients and preparation instructions and told them our immediate family of four would observe a mini-Thanksgiving dinner on the Wednesday before Thanksgiving. So yes, I was going to debut in the turkey department!

And finally, at least for me, I was going to be able solve the “mystery” of the cranberry sauce I had heard about but didn’t know what it was for, what it tasted like, was it a dipping sauce for the vegetables, or was it meant to be eaten on its own?

My girls and I gathered plenty of information, drafted our grocery list, and enlisted the help of a Publix employee to help us find some of the ingredients. I’m happy to report that we made stuffing, cranberry sauce and gravy from scratch, in addition to some other stuff, and it was all edible!

And while I now know what the cranberry sauce is for, it will not become a staple of our meals anytime soon.

The exercise was enlightening, fun, and created great memories for our family.

It also provided an opportunity for our family – like everyone in the nation – to take part in this early American tradition that we have made our own.

Maritza Martinez ’00 ’05MA ’11MBA is director of the �鶹ӳ����ý’s Community Relations department.  She can be reached at Maritza.Martinez@ucf.edu.

This is a reposting from the �鶹ӳ����ý Forum, a series of opinion columns from faculty, staff and students who serve on a panel for a year. A new column is posted each Wednesday on �鶹ӳ����ý Today and then broadcast on W�鶹ӳ����ý-FM (89.9) between 7:50 and 8 a.m. Sunday. Opinions expressed are those of the columnists, and are not necessarily shared by the �鶹ӳ����ý.

Up to 25 bags will be placed outside KHK Pantry in Ferrell Commons for students to pick up while campus is closed Nov. 24-28. The bags are filled with food donated to the pantry. In year’s past, they’ve included tuna, boxed mashed potatoes, crackers, canned vegetables, canned fruit, soup, oatmeal and bottled water, said pantry manager Alexander Botchen. �鶹ӳ����ý’s Transfer & Transition office has been collecting food since early October for this holiday service.

KHK Pantry was founded in 2009 by �鶹ӳ����ý students who sought to help fellow Knights facing financial difficulties, and to make sure students never needed to choose between buying textbooks or food. In the 2015-16 academic year, KHK Pantry served more than 13,300 students, Botchen said.

Many express their gratitude for time shared and getting through another year. The �鶹ӳ����ý’s students, faculty and staff were asked to share what they are most thankful for this year.

There were some common threads – family, health, safety, freedom and opportunity.

Tyler Brooks, 19, a digital media game-design major, expressed his thanks for his family support throughout his college career.

“T���y are always willing to back up any of the choices that I make. They have supported me with everything, from this test I’m about to take to financial support, to just being there as family,” he said.

Others were thankful that their families were healthy.

“We have been through a lot this year, with something happening every other month,” said Karena Edun, a biotechnology and chemistry major. “One month my brother fell down the stairs and a few months later my father had a heart attack. He thankfully is alive and now much healthier. My sister, a few months after that, was hit by a van and she luckily was not hurt severely and had no broken bones. We have gone through a lot but we have also grown a lot together.”

In the wake of so many recent tragic events globally, David Phan, a biomedical sciences major, said he was most thankful for his family and his family’s safety. Rebekah Addy, who works for the College of Graduate Studies, added to her list the freedom to worship freely.

Katie Tighe, a program assistant at Rosen College and a student seeking an elementary education master’s degree, said freedom is a big one for her.

“I’m thankful to live in the USA where I am free to make my own choices,” she said. “I’m also thankful to both work for and study at �鶹ӳ����ý, which promotes and supports my academic and professional growth.”

Many gave thanks for opportunity, such as Tawana Anderson, who works as a custodian on campus.

“I am thankful for a job and to just be alive,” she said.

Whatever you are thankful for this holiday season, the �鶹ӳ����ý wishes you a safe and happy Thanksgiving.

To see what faculty, staff and students had to say, visit �鶹ӳ����ý’s official .

If you will be away from �鶹ӳ����ý during the holidays, make sure to take expensive items such as jewelry, laptops and other valuables with you. Have a friend or trusted neighbor collect any mail, packages or newspapers, or ask the U.S. Postal Service to hold your mail until you return.

The holidays are a busy travel time, and it’s important to be safe on the road. �鶹ӳ����ýPD is joining agencies across the country in a Click It or Ticket seat belt enforcement wave that will go through Nov. 30, and officers will issue citations to drivers and passengers who are not wearing a seat belt.

Holiday festivities also can lead to risks on the road. If your plans involve alcohol, elect a sober driver before you go out, or plan on taking a taxi. Never drink and drive or get in a car with a driver who is impaired.

�鶹ӳ����ý Police will continue to patrol campus during the holiday season, and law enforcement will pay special attention to residential areas and shopping centers.

Ultimately, safety is a team effort, and crime awareness and the reporting of suspicious activity lessen the chances of crime occurring. If you see something, say something, and report sketchy behavior to 911.

Best wishes for a Happy Thanksgiving and successful finish to the fall semester.

For more information about hospitality management education at Rosen College, please visit .

Of course the holiday is rife with baggage (literal and figurative), and many people will boycott it entirely or will visibly or invisibly limit their participation, whether because of the problematic history of the events it represents, because of their own personal associations with the holiday, or because of work schedules, travel limitations, or distance from friends and family. Whatever we’re doing, most of us will have thanks on the brain for at least a few minutes this week, and that’s a good thing. But gratitude can be a sticky wicket.

In the long-running TV cop series “The Closer,” Kyra Sedgwick’s title character, Brenda Leigh Johnson, was constantly saying “thank you” in a deep Southern drawl to everyone around her, including employees, strangers, and even the criminals she was famous for driving to confess. Though many scenarios called her sincerity into question, and often her gratitude was met with a significant eye roll from those around her, I loved this aspect of her character because it vividly showed the power of saying thanks.

Brenda packed apology, intimidation, and a firm change of topic into every drawn-out “thank yoooou,” leaving those around her speechless, for there is no established negative retort to an expression of appreciation, sincere or not.

Complicated thank-yous are everywhere. In the past couple of decades, a secular cult of gratitude has emerged around us. During her high-profile years, Oprah Winfrey wove together tenets of pop psychology and world religions to present gratitude as a path to a centered and positive life, encouraging viewers and readers to focus on blessings over challenges.

A contemporary offshoot is the frequent social media trend in which friends ask each other to post things for which they are grateful. Taggees then share appreciation for beautiful sunsets, great families, good health, and steady jobs, occasionally teetering on the brink of publically sanctioned bragging.

But despite the cynicism that may come through in these observations, I believe that gratitude is incredibly powerful and important for a variety of reasons.

Gratitude helps us keep things in perspective. Even the most seasoned pessimist can think of ways in which most situations could be worse. Feeling and expressing gratitude for the positive things around us can shift our focus from what’s working against us to what’s working for us, and, in my opinion, a positive attitude can materially impact the outcome of many situations.

Sincerely accepting gratitude connects us with other people. Many of us are better at thanking others and even doing things for others than we are at receiving thanks. I’m thinking not of the ritualistic thanks we receive in daily life but of those moments when we have had a real impact. Engaging with another person and openly accepting their acknowledgment that something we have done for them has shaped their life in a positive way can be a humbling experience. It sometimes requires us to accept praise for something that we did because we knew it was the right thing to do. It sometimes causes us to reflect on what more we could have done. But it almost always requires us to see ourselves and our actions, momentarily, through the eyes of another, which can be an intimidating but gratifying act.

Expressing gratitude also helps us to feel it.

In preparation for writing this column, I crowdsourced what I called “compulsory gratitude” with my social media friends. I asked the value of, for example, requiring children to write thank-you notes for gifts. While a couple of friends expressed concern about the idea of forcing children to lie about their feelings, most suggested that gratitude is a process that requires practice. One friend suggested that expressing thanks is a critical element of being part of a community and compared requiring students to learn the practice to what she called “compulsory clothing in public.”

A cousin who works in social services pointed out that there are developmental reasons to require children to engage in rituals of gratitude. Faculty colleagues noted the positive experiences they’ve had with asking students to write thank-you notes to guest speakers, suggesting that people enjoy the opportunity to express appreciation even in those contexts when they might not have thought of it on their own, and that everyone appreciates receiving a handwritten thank-you.

Friends cited theorists and religious figures to suggest the same basic concept: The experience of gratitude is learned through practice and socialization.

And it’s good for you—like your green bean casserole.

Melody Bowdon is executive director of �鶹ӳ����ý’s Karen L. Smith Faculty Center for Teaching and Learning and is a professor of writing and rhetoric.��She can be reached at melody@ucf.edu.��

With Thanksgiving just around the corner, many of us soon will be reunited with our beloved families and friends for a delicious feast filled with turkey, pie, and whatever else your heart desires. Even if you don’t celebrate Thanksgiving this way, you may still get to enjoy time off from school or work to focus on yourself and your loved ones.

And so, with the end of fall, comes winter. Aside from the fact that Florida weather rarely drops below 40 degrees, the arrival of winter brings finals week and the hectic holiday season.

For students, I like to refer to this period as the calm before the storm. As much as I love to daydream about roasted turkey, I have to be realistic. Like all semesters, this one has been long and hard, but before we can celebrate our accomplishments, we must conquer one final hurdle: the final exam.

Whether you have dreaded that exam since the first day of class or you have been enthusiastically gathering sources for your paper all semester, you must now face this final challenge of the year. Just like all things in life for everyone – not just students — if you have a final paper or project, you should not procrastinate until the last minute to get started! Revisions are the key to perfection and are necessary for a commendable submission.

Time management is also an important skill to practice if you want to move on to a professional career. I admit that I have been guilty of procrastinating on occasion depending on the project, but when I have something I am passionate about, I am cognizant of the time.

And if you are struggling in a class, simply ask for help. Consult with your professor or teaching assistant on how you can improve before the final assessment. Never assume about your status in a class or at your job. I once had a friend who thought he had an ‘A’ until he found out at the end of the semester that the professor had subtracted points every time my friend took his phone out to check the time.

Some of you may have semesters left to finish while others may be graduating in December. If you are walking for commencement, arrive early and dress appropriately. After all, you are representing the university, and your family may have traveled from far away to support you on your big day. I suggest that you do not come late with mismatched shoes and a hangover.

Winter can also be a stressful time for everyone because of the holidays. Whether you are cooking for a large family or preparing for an office party, you may have a daunting task ahead. Make sure you do all your shopping early for the event or holiday. My mom always scowls me for procrastinating before a holiday party to buy a gift or food.

I constantly struggle with finding the perfect gifts for my parents because they do not view material belongings in the same way. They grew up in small, rural villages along the coast of Vietnam and often did not have money for presents. As a result, they prefer handmade gifts, which they believe have more sentimental value.

However, after about 20 years of working on do-it-yourself projects, I believe that my creative juices have run dry. If you are experiencing the same problem, I suggest creating a Pinterest account to explore new ideas.

If you are a parent, remember that spending time with your child will always be more valuable than an iPad or a new toy. My brother and I would always look forward to the holidays when we were growing up because my parents would have the entire day off to play with us. Sure we would have liked a new Barbie or action figure, but nothing can ever replace family.

So as winter dawns upon us, use your time wisely. Do not be lured into a false sense of security.

You might not be defending against video zombies or massive armies of trained killers led by the “mother of dragons,” but you do have your own battles to face. Remember that there is light at the end of the tunnel, and we will be able to relax during the winter break.

Vu Tran is an anthropology graduate student in �鶹ӳ����ý’s College of Sciences and a recipient of the �鶹ӳ����ý Order of Pegasus for academic achievement. She can be reached at vuqntran@knights.ucf.edu.

For me, the beginning of “the season” is evidenced by the conversion of one of my pre-set radio stations to play Christmas and holiday tunes on a loop. The evidence on my Facebook newsfeed is also a giveaway, noticing that since Nov. 1 everyone is declaring what he or she is thankful for every day.

Ironic to me, though, are the comments of users who start being thankful on Nov.1 and then post an update on Nov. 5 with “I forgot to be thankful the past four days so here are five things I’m thankful for all at once.”

At first I thought, “Aw, that is so sweet,” but that quickly changed to “I’m sorry, but really?” Come on now, it’s the season! While I love to read what others are thankful for and personally keep up with their thanks on social media, I just wish it weren’t a huge declaration or movement when they decide to pause to be thankful for what I hope they are also doing every other month of the year.

When people “forget” to be thankful, not just in November, it’s kind of sad.

So, what does “’Tis the Season” mean, anyway? Does it mean a special red cup at Starbucks, or a Thanksgiving sub from Publix, declaring your thanks via social media, or a random act of kindness by paying for the person behind you in line? It seems that’s what it has become, but I think it’s more than that.

Now, I certainly appreciate and value the sentiment behind the holidays. People bustle with excitement, generosity, and the hope of a fresh start come the New Year. Sometimes, though, I just wonder why everyone seems to become friendlier as the holidays approach. I say “the holidays” because it means something different to everyone.

Yet, in a country where we are afforded many freedoms but still struggle with social discord among an array of controversial issues, in these last two months of the year the holidays symbolizing something different to everyone seem to often be forgotten. We tend to be blind to those who are different than us, and instead of alienating them, we offer our generosity and warm personalities.

It creates a sense of peace…it creates a certain social climate. A season, I might say.

Many celebrate Thanksgiving, Christmas, Hanukkah, Kwanzaa and other holidays – some in a religious sense, while others do not. Ten months out of the year, these differences in what the holidays mean would drive us crazy and create an immense amount of friction among our subcultures. Ten months out of the year, we find it extremely hard to accept why someone might celebrate differently from us, and even wonder if their moral compass is pointed in the right direction, without ever questioning our own.

If we are able to look past differences during “the season,” to come together and be our most accepting and giving selves to spread a shared sense of peace and excitement among all, why does that have to change with the start of a new year?

My message today is concise. On Jan. 1, we will be focused on our resolutions, hoping to become improved versions of ourselves during the next 12 months. Sadly, as the hope of “the season” fades, many of these resolutions will fail. The year will get in the way. It will become busy and messy, just as it was before the pumpkin spice lattes and Black Friday deals. We will begin to make excuses.

But folks, I’ve seen what we can do when we come together and forget differences. We are actually nice to each other. We listen.

In the two months of the year that I feel the change in spirits, I actually like talking to strangers. They are different from the strangers that I meet January through October.

So, I have just one request. After celebrating “the season” in whatever capacity you choose, when your heart and spirit are most full, resolve not merely to work out more, to spend less money, or in my case, rescue fewer cats (because we all know that will fail).

Instead, pick something that could last: Resolve to simply be a better stranger.

Erin O’Flaherty is a senior pursuing a bachelor’s degree in accounting and the current Miss �鶹ӳ����ý. She can be reached at eoflaherty@knights.ucf.edu.